Ranma's mind Open book
by slain666
Summary: Akane has gained the ability to read Ranma's mind, among other things
1. Default Chapter

*I don't own dis', Rumiko Takahashi own dis'*  
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This is my first fic so be kind, it is lime-ish, will write more if j00 liek eet.  
luckychucky01@hotmail.com if you wanna dis' me.  
  
* = thoughts so j00 not get conf00zed.  
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Like events which happen all too frequently at the Tendo Residence, resulting in the pounding of heads with enormous wooden mallets, that is, the verbal onslaught that occurs between one pigtailed boy/girl and the violent kitchen destroyer, specifically Ranma eating one bite of Akane's cooking and trying hard not to retch the contents of his stomach.  
  
"Awww MAN!! Your cooking couldn't possibly get any worse than this crap! Whadya put in it? sulfuric acid or somethin!?" Ranma complained loudly,  
  
"Ranma you JERK!! You know how long it took to cook that for you!? Why can't you be nice and encourage me for once!?"  
  
"Okay, way to go Akane! This industrial strength paint thinner tastes great!!"  
  
*WHAM!*   
As the sound of wood meeting bone echo's throughout the house.  
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Later that evening Ranma is sitting on the roof talking to himself.  
  
"That kawaiikune tomboy, why does she make me eat stuff that she knows doesn't taste no good, then she acts surprised when I tell her it's horrible, what does she want me to do? Lie and say it tastes good when it doesn't, liked she'd believe that while i'm keeled over grasping my stomach in pain"  
  
*But you know she's trying her best to please you* Says a little voice in his head,  
  
"Yeah maybe she does try, but... ...How else am I spose to react? 'well done Akane that tasted like shit but hey at least your trying' that'd just sound sarcastic"  
  
*...*  
  
"There's just no way of pleasing her, not matter what I do I just keep sticking my foot in my mouth, maybe I should just give up on her"  
  
*But you don't want to, do you?*  
  
"How the hell should I know? I'm pretty sure she doesn't like me as much as I like her, she made THAT perfectly clear right from the start"  
  
*So what will you do now?*  
  
"I don't know what I'm suppose to do, I just know that things can't continue on this way"  
  
At that very moment a shooting star shot across the sky.  
  
"I just wish I could somehow let her know how i feel"  
  
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Akane is in her room griping about the events of that evening.  
  
"That stupid insensitive pervert! I know my cooking isn't very good but why does he have to be so mean about it, I try so hard and he just throws it back in my face!"  
  
*At least he doesn't bash it in with a giant mallet* Says the little voice in her head  
  
"HE DESERVED IT!!!"  
  
*Just like he deserves to writhe in pain after eating your cooking*  
  
"I don't do it on purpose! I just..."  
  
*just what*  
  
"It's not like I intentionally cook horrible food just to hurt him, I want to be able to please him but I just can't, that's why he's always going to Ukyo or Shampoo behind my back"  
  
*...*  
  
"Why, why does he stay, he's always complaining about how violent and uncute I am, how horrible my cooking is, so then why doesn't he just leave for someone who will obviously be able to make him happy"  
  
*Do you want him to leave?*  
  
"No... ...I just... ...Wish he'd be nice to me"  
  
*The way he is around Ukyo?*  
  
"She's just his friend, he's not really interested in her, 'I think' but yes, I do wish he'd act that way with me, when he's around her he doesn't bottle his feeling up inside like he does around me"  
  
*You want to know his innermost thoughts and feelings*  
  
She thinks about it for a while.  
  
"....yes"  
  
Just then a shooting star shot across the sky.  
  
"I just wish I knew how he truly feels"  
  
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It's the following morning at the Tendo household and something strange is happening, though something strange always happens, therefore today is a perfectly normal day.  
  
"Ranma WAKE UP!" Akane yells  
  
"Euuuurrrrrrge" Ranma mumbles as he fights to remain in peaceful slumber  
  
"Ranma! If you don't get up now your dad will eat your breakfast!"  
  
"*snort* HUH! Wha, eurrge, must get up, must eat"  
  
Ranma puts on his clothes and walks wearily downstairs after Akane and sits at the table as Kasumi brings the food to the table.  
  
*Hmmm, wonder if I can get through the day without Akane beating the crap outof me or trying to feed me her so called food* He Thought  
  
"What did you say!" Yelled Akane,  
  
*Huh, did I say that or just think it*   
"hmmph?" Said Ranma, mouth half full of rice, then swallowed  
  
"what tha hell ya talkin about I didn't say nuthin!" He yelled  
*Stupid kawaiikune tomboy, what's she angry about now?*  
  
"What're you some kinda ventriloquist now!?"  
  
"A ventriliwhat?"  
*what the hells she talking about??*  
  
*How's he doing that? OH SHIT! The wish I made last night, I can hear his thoughts! Umm, better not let on though*  
"Oh {looks down at her hands) I'm sorry Ranma, I'm a bit on edge today, must be that time of the month" she said lamely  
  
*Gee, I know how that feels* he thought  
  
Akane begins laughing uncontrollably, Ranma looks at her, confusion written all over his face.  
  
"What the hell's so funny Akane, you goin insane or sumthin?"  
  
"No, I just realized that, you're the only guy I know who has explicit knowledge of what 'that time of the month' feels like"  
  
"GEEZ TELL THE WHOLE WORLD WHY DONCHA!!!"  
  
At this point Genma looks at his son with food hanging out of his mouth, a glazed over look in his eyes.  
"Ranma.. ..you've had. ...periods??"  
  
Ranma simply put his head is his hands and grumbled something incoherent.  
  
*So it's going to be one of THOSE days, I guess I can look forward to a whole 24 hours of weird!* He thought, dreading the day ahead, as it looked to be a bad one.  
Ranma quickly shovels as much food in his mouth as he can and leaves the house in a hurry, not wanting to hear about menstrual cycles or Soun's wailing, as he was leaving Akane got up and chased after him.  
  
"Ranma wait for me! why're you in such a hurry"  
  
"I'm not!"  
*Geez if word gets out that I've had periods before I'll never hear the end of it*  
  
"Ranma I'm sorry about what I said, I know you're sensitive about that kind of thing"  
  
Ranma stops running and simply looks her in the eyes, looking a bit frustrated Ranma spoke.  
  
"How'd you know about that, I've never told anyone"  
*God I can remember the first time it happened in China, I was terrified*  
  
"Ranma, I just, it was just a joke I didn't really know"  
*At least not until you thought about it I didn't, I wonder what other secret's he has in that pea brain of his*  
  
"Great, now everyone knows"  
*It's not really her fault I guess, they would've found out sooner or later*  
  
Just then he walks by a familiar old woman throwing water out onto the sidewalk, like always he is transformed into a beautiful young girl.  
  
"Just great"  
*You'd think by now I'd be smart enough to avoid that old woman*  
  
Akane is surprised when she notices something peculiar  
  
*His voice, I mean, why does the voice in his head sound like a girl, I thought he was a boy trapped in a girls body, so why do his thoughts sound different*  
  
She ponders this question while she walks, Ranma has once again taken her position walking ontop of the fence along side the canal.  
  
*Hmmm, I didn't really expect it to stay a secret for ever but it could've waited a while, like I need people knowin all my problems, especially girly problems like that (looks down at Akane) and how did Akane know about it, some wild guess, yeah right, hmmm, I wonder what's on her mind right now, I can tell that she's thinking about something, she sortof looks cute from this angle aswell*  
  
*cute? Why would Ranma be thinking something like that, I'm never cute, at least not in Ranma's eyes*  
  
*Look at her, now she's blushing, damn she looks sexy, wonder if it's me she's thinking about, and if she is, is it my boy side or girl side she's fantisizing about, gee, and she calls me a pervert*  
  
*He thinks I'M a pervert??? Wait a minute. Sexy?? me, the violent, uncute, unsexy tomboy, SEXY??? Hmmm, time to have a little fun with him, her, whatever*  
"Ranma, do you think I'm sexy?"  
  
"What!? You sexy? No way! You're a big butch tomboy is what you are!"  
*NO! Why the hell did I say that, stupid stupid stupid stupid, YOU ARE SEXY DAMMIT, man if you only knew how badly I want you, good work Ranma, good old foot in mouth technique, and now comes the pain, I might as well just dive head first into a mallet when ever I see one*  
  
Akane starts giggling, Ranma simply stares at Akane with a confused expression, trying to think what to say.  
  
*Man the pressure musta got to her, she's going nuts and it's all my fault, I finally drove her insane*  
  
Ranma Jumps off the fence and stops in front of Akane.  
  
"Akane what's wrong with you today, I just called you a butch tomboy and you're laughing, you're spose to get mad and mallet me in the head, are you feeling all right?" Says Ranma as she feels Akanes head to check and see if she has a fever.  
  
*He thinks I'm sexy! He want's me! but. ..we'll never get anywhere if he can't open up to me* she thinks her head filling with conflicting emotions.  
"I'm fine Ranma it's just...(blushing at the feel of Ranma's hand against her forehead) ...I just wish you'd be honest with me for once" said Akane wiping the tears of laughter/sadness out of her eyes.  
  
Before Ranma can figure out the meaning behind Akane's words Tatewaki Kuno arrives to woo his loves with his manly charms.  
  
"Ah the fair Akane Tendo and the beauteous pig tailed girl, I see neither of you are in the presence of the wretch Saotome, surely he fears my almighty wrath, come to me my loves and I will liberate you from his evil clutches!"  
  
*Oh great, it's Kuno, I wonder what nonsense is gunna come outa his big stupid mouth today?   
''KUNO!"  
  
Ranma starts running towards the love struck kendo-ist arms wide as if to accept his loving embrace, and at the very last moment simply extends her leg kicking him square in the balls, he keels over in mind altering pain muttering something.  
  
"aaAAaarrge, pig... ...nnnggrr... ...tailed...Grrlll *cough* my...nNNnnGGgrRe"  
  
*Hmm, I used to consider being a girl a weakness, but that's one weak point I don't have to worry about... at least not now*  
"c'mon Akane let's hurry or we'll be late for school, did you have the foresight to bring a thermos with ya? I could use one right about now!"  
  
"Sorry Ranma, you left in such a hurry I didn't have the chance to bring one with me, oh and lets not hurry to school, why don't you walk next to me on the way there?"  
*I just wanna see him squirm*  
  
"Okay Akane but don't blame me if Hinako Sensei drains our chi for being delinquents"  
*What's with Akane she's being... ...nice, not that I mind or anything*  
  
Just when things were looking up Kuno grabbed both Ranma and Akane from behind after recovering from having his testicles crushed.  
  
"Akane Tendo, pigtailed girl! No amount of suffering can deter me from my ultimate goal of dating thee both, not even the wretch Saotome with his evil magics can prevent me from*POW* Both Ranma and Akane have sent Kuno into the stratosphere.  
  
"That pervert, hmph"  
*Kuno is such an idiot, he hates me and loves me at the same time, and he want's to break me and Akane apart so he can date both of us, what a blind moron, if he weren't such an idiot he may have actually found a real girlfriend by now, I mean he ain't so bad lookin when he stops rambling on about bullshit.. Although it is kinda flattering, it's nice to know that if I gotta be a girl I at least get to be an attractive girl, even if it is to the wrong gender, hmmm, I know Akane can tell I make a cute girl, but I wonder if she finds me attractive like this....*  
  
*That PERVERT, what's he thinking about!? Me attracted to his girl side???*(Begins blushing furiously)  
  
*Oh man, she's standing right next to me, what I wouldn't give to just drag her into an alley way and, WAIT! gotta stop thinking about this stuff, I mean I'm a girl right now so I shouldn't be thinking stuff like this, it ain't natural, but then again, we will be married some day, and so she'll probably be curious. Whew good thing I'm a girl right now or else I'd be making a trouser tent right about now, hmm, I'm getting a little tingly down there though, NO! Must focus, must think about completely unrelated things like MARTIAL ARTS! Yeah, I love to kick peoples asses at martial arts, I'd love to do something with Akane's ass, certainly not kick it though, lick it perhaps...*  
  
Ranma's mind continues to drift between Akane and other topics while trying not to let on that she's aroused, but since Akane can hear her thoughts, she is very aware of Ranma's current mental state.  
  
*That sick sick PERVERT! he's DISGUSTING! ARGE!*  
  
*Then I'd dribble honey all over her body especially her tits, and then slowly lick it off cleaning her entire body with my tongue and then i'd*  
  
*STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT!!! Damn it Ranma, stop thinking about it now I'm getting horny too!*  
  
Akane beings to imagine the situations that Ranma is describing with her thoughts, suddenly a brief moan escapes her lips, the sound breaks Ranma from her reverie and she realizes that Akane is extremely aroused.  
  
"Akane, what's wrong with you!"  
*Oh my god she's horny, she, she wants me! I can see it in her eye's, she wants me to do her right now*  
  
"Ranma please stop! I can't take it anymore, you're making me all wet! Don't, don't think about it"  
*WHAT AM I SAYING!?*  
  
*she's WET!? oh man I'm wet too, and it's rubbing between my thighs, why'd I have to wear boxers?*  
"Akane stop what, I'm not doin nuthin!"  
  
Akane begins massaging Ranma's breasts with her hands and rubbing herself against the smaller girls body, her hands seemingly roaming of their own volition, as she does this Ranma starts moaning at the sudden physical contact.  
  
"RAAAANNNNNMMAAAAAA!!!" Yelled the eternally lost boy who coincidentally stumbled into view of the situation currently unfolding.  
  
"What!? Oh! Ryoga, this ain't what it looks like honestly!"  
  
"Ranma, for shamelessly molesting Akane, YOU, SHALL, DIE!!!!" He yelled as he launched an all out attack.  
"BAKUSAI TENKETSU!!!"   
  
Ranma used her superior speed to block all of ryoga's attacks and catch the flying rocks that emanated from ryoga's breaking point blasts, little did Ryoga know though that he was slowly being drawn into an ever tightening spiral.  
  
*Stupid fucking Ryoga, what right does he have to be angry at me, he's the one sleeping in MY fiance's bed!*  
  
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN SLEEPING IN MY BED!!!!" screamed Akane, interrupting the fierce battle, the remnants of a hiryu shoten ha simply dissipating as the two fighters stared at Akane.  
  
"RANMA! What the hell do mean by 'Ryoga sleeping in my bed!!!!????"  
  
"Huh, I never said that Akane!"  
  
"Ranma, what did you tell Akane!?" Ryoga pleaded, forgetting his earlier outrage.  
  
"I didn't tell her nuthin I swear!"  
  
"DIDN'T TELL ME WHAT!!!??"  
  
*Oh my god if she finds out that Ryoga is P-Chan we're both done for*  
  
"RYOGA IS P-CHAN!!? WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU TELL ME!!!??"  
  
"I was honor bound never to tell you, I promised him, and it's cowardly to reveal an opponent's weakness!"  
*I felt so guilty about causing him so much pain, the only thing that ever made him happy was being your pet Akane, how could I deny him that meager consolation?*  
  
"You let him take advantage of you Ranma, what about my honor huh?"  
"And YOU! This is how you repay Ranma's kindness!? By sleeping with his fiancee, I HATE YOU RYOGA, WHY DON'T YOU JUST GET LOST IN A FUCKING DESERT SOMEWHERE AND DIE!!!" Akane is yelling at the top of her lungs, at her whits end.  
  
"Akane I'm sorry I meant to tell you but I'm just such a pathetic coward I really am a disgusting PIG!" cried Ryoga as he slumps to the ground in a sobbing heap, as he sobs a dark aura appears around his body, he looks up at Ranma and his eyes turn from sorrow into rage.  
"I don't know how Akane found out my secret Ranma, but somehow...I JUST KNOW THAT IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!!! PREPARE TO DIE RANMA!!!"  
  
Ryoga then braces his feet to perform his most powerful shi shi hokodan, and Ranma steps back in fear.  
  
"what, what the hell are you talking about Ryoga, I didn't tell her nuthin I swear" said Ranma,  
  
"Ranma! Run away he's guna kill you!" Yelled Akane,  
  
"SHI SHI!*Crack!*Urk**" Ryoga was interrupted as the previously airborne Kuno fell head first into the lost boy, who was still barely standing, straining under the kendo-ists weight which pressed against his own skull, Ryoga seemed to be con cussed though still standing and eyes watering while Kuno simply looked at Ranma from his upside down position with no obvious change in expression.  
  
"Um, Kuno?"  
  
"Ah my pigtailed goddess, once again have I saved you from peril, this loathsome brute most likely one of the sorcerer Soatome's evil minions" Kuno said in his usual tone  
  
Ranma, no longer worried about Ryoga, simply stares at Kuno dumbfounded.  
  
"Um, Kuno, didn't that hurt? I mean you must've fallen a good few thousand feet" Ranma asked  
  
"Oh pigtailed girl! You are truly concerned are you not! I, hmm, this is strange, I can't seem to be able to move, pigtailed girl, i..feel...sleeepy....." Kuno manages to utter as the blood begins to swell inside his skull"  
  
"Hmm, weird" says Ranma simply, then grabs Akane by the arm and begins to run to school.  
"C'mon lets go!"  
*Gota get to school and quick, before anymore weird shit happens*  
  
As they run from view Ryoga and Kuno can be seen as a silhouette in the background, looking like a human totem pole, a tumbleweed blows past as they remain completely inanimate.  
  
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Ranma, once again male sits at his desk pondering some things, while Akane listens.  
  
*I just don't get it, Akane could never figure out Ryoga was P-chan before, so how did she all of a sudden KNOW about it, without anyone having told her, I mean I'd always call Ryoga P-chan, I'd call P-chan Ryoga, I'd say stuff like 'Oh P-chan is closer than you think' when Ryoga was around, there was the time when that girl Azusa called both P-chan and Ryoga Charlotte, there was the time Ryoga and P-chan had the same tattoo's on their stomachs, I did everything I could to help Akane figure it out aside from simply coming right out and saying 'hey Akane funny thing, did you know Ryoga was P-chan?' ALL THAT, and she still couldn't figure it out, so how did she come to the realization that Ryoga was P-chan without me telling her?*  
  
Akane could hear the gears inside Ranma's head slowly turning trying to work out the puzzle. She felt she had to do something to curb Ranma's thought processes, for Akane knew that Ranma had a one track mind. Once he started thinking about something he didn't stop until he came to a conclusion. So she had to try and distract him, it wouldn't do to have her new talent realized. She had to observe Ranma's mind in it's natural state. If he were to be self conscious of his thoughts it would ruin the purpose altogether. So Akane did the only thing she could think of, and that was to come onto him, something completely out of character like that should shock him enough to make him completely forget what he was thinking about, and with that she stood up, walked over to him, and glomped onto him from behind his chair, he was so deep in thought he didn't even realize she'd snuck up on him.  
  
"Urk!"  
*Oh great, who's hugging me, I didn't see Shampoo come in here* he thought, it usually was the voluptuous Amazon who did the glomping.  
"Raannnnma" Akane purred into his ear seductively,  
  
"a-a-Akane?" he stuttered while she affectionately rubbed her breasts against his back,  
"Akane stop doin that people can see y'know!"  
*Great, this is the second time today she's gotten all weird like this, we're guna have to go to our next class soon and if Akane don't stop rubbin herself all over me I'm guna poke right through my pants*  
  
Akane blushed and quickly let go of the boy sometimes girl satisfied that Ranma would be pondering her strange affectionate behaviour instead of wondering how she figured out that Ryoga was P-chan, though she had wanted to yell at him for not telling her, she decided to bite her tongue and let it blow over.  
  
"Uh, umm, Ranma, do you want to see a movie after school?" Akane asked  
*this will give me time to get close to him*  
  
"Uh, sure thing Akane, heh heh" said Ranma as he stood holding his hand behind his head,   
  
"Great! I'll talk to you at lunch Ranma" She said smiling happily  
  
*Oh man, with the way she's been acting she'll probably want me to kiss her or somethin* he thought as the bell rang signaling to go from homeroom to their first class, he then looked back at Akane's happy grin as another thought entered his head.  
*She is sooo cute!*   
  
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All during class Akane furiously wrote out notes, she took her new project very seriously, though she felt somewhat guilty about prying inside Ranma's head like this, it was all in the name of science, or chemistry rather, the chemistry between her and Ranma of course, she would write down absolutely everything about herself that Ranma either liked or disliked, as his thoughts would constantly linger on her, which she noted, made her very happy, that her fiancee was so enthralled by her, it wasn't often he thought of much else, although he would occasionally think about his other so called "fiancee's" but mainly to mentally gripe about the situation, as they tended to get in the way of his personal interests, and also Akane noted, caused many misunderstandings, which led her to one key point in her analysis, "Akane always thinks the worst of me" this she vowed, would change, after all, Ranma was always faithful, yet he received no praise for his efforts, only pain, the kind only a mallet can administer.  
  
*I really am a bitch aren't I?* Akane thought, not too pleased with herself. She'd never seen herself through someone elses eyes before, and Ranma wasn't pulling any punches with his mental mud slinging.  
  
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It's lunchtime at furinkan high school and Akane has gone outside looking for Ranma.  
  
"Ranma.." Akane said in a small voice as she approached her fiancee resting against a tree,  
  
"Yeah Akane?"   
  
"Ranma, I'm..sorry.." she said in an almost whisper, her head downcast,  
  
"Hey Akane, what's wrong, what do you have to be sorry about? Hey, don't look so sad" He said walking towards her so that he can comfort her  
  
"Ranma, I'm sorry I never trusted you"  
  
"Hey don't feel bad Akane, I never trusted you either, like the time you spent with shinnosuke, I was certain you'd left me for someone else, I don't think I'm any better than you are at being trustful, it's just your way of protecting yourself" He said while stroking her hair.  
  
"Akane!"   
  
Akane was jolted from her little daydream as she sat quietly next to Ranma.  
  
"Yes Ranma?"  
  
"What movie are we guna see?"  
*Oh god I hope she doesn't wanna see a chick flick*  
  
"We'll see whatever you want to see Ranma"   
  
"Oh I heard about this Jet Lee movie called 'The One' it's spose to kick ass" He said enthusiastically,  
  
"Ok we'll see that then"  
  
As Akane and Ranma sat under a tree occasionally sharing idle chit chat and eating their lunch, Kuno chose to finally make his appearance.  
  
"Get away from the fair Akane Tendo you fiend, and what have you done with the lovely pigtailed girl!?"  
  
"Kuno, ummm, what happened to your head man?" Asked Ranma noticing the fresh bandages,  
  
"Ah it is the result of an injury I acquired in my quest to free the lovely pigtailed girl from your evil clutches, yet you have her under your evil spell so as to prevent her from expressing her truest love for me, now cease this meaningless distraction and prepare to do battle!"  
  
"Wait Ranma, I have a plan on how to get rid of Kuno for good, pick me up and jump over towards the swimming pool" Akane whispered in Ranma's ear,  
  
"erm, okay Akane if you say so" said Ranma as he scooped Akane up into his arms and bound towards the school swimming pool,  
  
"Okay Ranma now change into a girl" Akane commanded  
  
"But why do I gota.."  
  
"Just do it, it's part of my plan"  
  
Ranma did as he was told and splashed himself with cold water from the pool transforming himself once again into a cute little redhead.  
  
"Where has that coward run to! I wish to smite him! Oh, it is the beauteous pigtailed girl come to wish me luck in punishing the fiend Saotome"  
  
"No" interjected Akane  
  
"She came to visit ME, you see, we no longer love you Kuno"  
  
"Ah! It is the fiend Saotome who has cast a spell on you both!"  
  
Akane then moved closer to the redhead and clung to her possessively, while slightly rubbing against the shorter girl suggestively, this of course makes Ranma slightly nervous, not being used to public displays of affection, much less when it involves two girls.  
  
"No Kuno, we don't love Saotome San either, we've fallen in love with each other, isn't that right Ranma-chan?"  
  
Ranma tries to go along with the act, not quite as good an actress as Akane though.  
  
"Um, yeah Kuno, I l-love a-Akane s-so you can just go leave us alone, we ain't interested in boys, okay!"  
  
Kuno puts his head in one of his hands trying to contemplate what it is he is hearing.  
  
"I Tatewaki Kuno 'The Blue Thunder' of Furinkan High school, can stand this injustice no longer!" he says striking an impressive pose,  
  
"Huh, what the hell do you MEAN injustice, we got rid of Saotome San so why the hell're ya complaining you big retard!?" yelled the angry redhead,  
  
"So deeply hath thou been affected by the sorcerer Saotomes evil lusts that thou hath cast away all thy affections toward the male gender, allow me to show you the purity of my love for thee, and free you from your unnatural attraction to one another!" Kuno finishes his speech by lunging towards the two girls and catches them both in a strong embrace.  
  
"I TOLD YOU, WE AREN'T INTERESTED IN BOYS!!!" the two girls yell in unison as they punt him far into the heavens,  
  
"Akane, that plan didn't exactly work did it?"  
  
"No it didn't, I may have made it worse, sorry Ranma"  
  
"s'okay, I kinda had fun playing him for a fool like that, he really is a clueless moron"   
*heh heh, Akane just can't seem to keep her hands off of me, even when I'm a girl* She thinks turning towards the raven haired girl in question,  
  
Akane blushes crimson.  
  
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There, I fixed it, Ryoga's in character, and it's way more funny and stuff, now it's Akane who's OOC, poo, she's not beating up on ranma enough, but that is all due to her new found sensitivity and stuff, so don't complain, you mofo's! anyway this being the 3rd and final time I'm posting the first chapter, enjoy. 


	2. RMOB chapter 2

*I don't own dis', Rumiko Takahashi own dis'*  
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* = thoughts so j00 not get conf00zed.  
  
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Ranma's mind open book chapter 2  
  
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Authors notes.  
  
Yo, this is my first fic and it has been noted that the first chapter underwent some changes, it's not that I'm trying to please everyones tastes with this fic, with the 3rd rewrite having Ryoga attempt homicide instead of suicide, I just really disliked the direction I pointed it in, this was spose to be funny dammit, and I realized that yes, Ryoga was way out of character, and Akane is too, but in a funny way, so it's good, I'm not trying to write a Hamlet/Ranma crossover here so that's why I changed it, and now that I've hit my stride there will be less mid-story changes to annoy people, and also the main reason Akane is acting different is that she's extremely insecure about herself, she's got like an inferiority complex with Ranma's other fiance's but now that she KNOWS he's got it for her bad, she's more confident and forth coming y'know, well enjoy chapter 2 anyway.  
-Luke-  
  
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"Akane! Hurry up or we'll be late to the movie!" yelled Ranma from downstairs  
*Man it never took me this long to get ready as a girl, she's got no excuse*  
"C'mon! I'm dyin of boredom down here!"  
  
Akane makes her way down the stairs wearing a mid-length plaid skirt, tight blue blouse and an overcoat, sexy yet modest.  
"Honestly Ranma you have no patience at all, so how do I look"  
  
"Umm, you look fine lets go" he says nervously,  
*SEXY!* is the one word that come to his mind,  
  
Akane smiles coyly at Ranma,  
*That'll teach you to call me uncute you pervert* she thinks  
"Stop staring and lets go Ranma, you're the one who was complaining that we'd be late"  
  
Ranma's mind begins to function again and they walk out of the house and head in the direction of the local cinema, Genma and Soun watch on with hopeful expressions, they then turn back to their shoji board.  
  
"Saotome, could it be that those two have finally started getting along?"  
  
"Tendo, I think that the future of the Saotome and Tendo schools of anything goes martial arts are secure"  
  
"That they are Saotome, oh look they're fighting again (points in the general direction they were walking)  
  
"What, I don't see anything (looks back at the board) Oh! It seems you have the advantage Tendo, but nonetheless I do plan on.. what's that! (more pieces magically vanish)  
  
"What, what is it?" Asks Tendo as the ritual cheating continues.  
  
-------------  
  
Shampoo watches Ranma and Akane walk hand in hand down the road along side the canal from a nearby rooftop, she appears quite agitated.  
  
"Violent pervert girl no steal Shampoo airen, Shampoo make sure of that" she says to herself as she stealthily moves with catlike grace from one rooftop to another so as to keep the pair in view. She keeps tailing them till they arrive at the cinema.  
  
*Hmm, kinda get the feeling someones following us, wouldn't surprise me with the number of people trying to keep me and Akane apart* Ranma thinks to himself, seemingly acquiring a sixth sense of his own, he ignores the nagging feeling in his gut and reluctantly enters the cinema. He pays for the tickets, buys snacks and drink and goes into the cinema and sits next to Akane. Almost as soon as the movie starts his mind begins to wander.  
  
*hmm, just yesterday Akane and me were at each others throat, now our relationship is the best it's ever been, Akane's been so nice to me recently, it almost seems like she's a different person, she hasn't hit me once all day or yelled at me or tried to feed me bad food or nuthin*  
  
Akane winces at the food comment but quickly eases violent urges. At that moment Ranma sees something peculiar, a man pretending to yawn and then place his arm around the girl next to him as if that was simply where it was meant to go, Ranma considers this carefully.  
  
*Hmm, Akane's been real nice and she's been flirting with me a lot recently so I guess I can put my arm around her, she won't mind, right* He continues to ponder this as he takes a sip of his soda, a fat man chose that exact moment to barge through to try and make a hasty exit to the toilet, causing Ranma to spill his soft drink all over himself, turning him into a wet, sticky, and very annoyed redhead.  
  
*Great, the soft drink is making my shirt stick against my chest, this is really uncomfortable* she grouses mentally over the situation,  
"I'm really sorry Akane, I know you wanted to go on a date with me as a guy"   
  
"That's okay Ranma, I'm not worried about what you look like, why don't you just go to the restroom and clean yourself up a bit?"  
  
"Okay Akane, I'll be right back okay"  
*maybe I'll get lucky and the restroom with have hot water* she thought hopefully  
  
No such luck unfortunately, Ranma wet her shirt with water from the sink and then dried her chest under the hand drier, then went back into the theatre and returned to her seat next to Akane.  
  
"Hey, I'm back, what happened while I was away?"   
  
"That guy played by Jet Lee went to this other dimension so he could kill himself, I don't get why but the martial arts in this is pretty cool"  
  
*What a dumb plot, but as long as it has fighting in it..*  
  
Ranma witnesses another stealth yawn/shoulder hug and returns to her previous thought.  
  
*there ain't no way Akane's guna want me to put my arm around her now, not with me as a girl, I mean what would people think right (looks over at Akane) but then again, who cares what other people think*  
  
Ranma then begins the fake yawn tactic she had seen performed twice now, and mid yawn considered simply putting her arms back down at her sides, but Akane grabbed Ranma's arm before she could put it back down and pulled it around her shoulder and affectionately cuddled against the redhead.  
  
"um, Akane" Ranma said looking the other girl in the eyes,  
  
"Ranma, don't ever hesitate to show me how you feel (she turns her head back towards the screen) anyway, I kinda like you this way Ranma"  
  
*Eep, she likes me this way!? she really does hate boys!*  
  
Akane couldn't help but giggle at that last comment.  
  
Shampoo is watching the two from the back row planning her course of action.  
  
*violent pervert girl try seduce girl type Ranma, Shampoo no can allow that* thinks the voluptuous Amazon,   
  
Shampoo chooses that exact moment to make her move, she takes a water pistol out of her bag and sprays Ranma with it.  
  
"What the hell, who did that! eww this stuff smells like sardines" exclaimed the redhead as she stood up angrily, as she did so Shampoo pulled a starving alley cat out of her bag and threw it at the sardine smelling girl.   
  
"Arge! c-c-CAT!" Ranma yelled as she leapt into the air to avoid the feline hellspawn, when she fell back down she tumbled over several rows of seats before landing in a mans lap,  
  
"Hey there young lady why don't you get comfortable, I'll protect you from that nasty cat" he said while groping the frightened redhead, who's eyes suddenly went red with fury,  
  
"YUCK! Stop touching me you ugly disgusting freak!" she said continuously punching him in the face making him even more ugly,  
  
The alley cat once more made a wild leap towards the furious redhead who suddenly turned white with fear again, she then jumped up and ran through the rows of seats in a mad dash and then tripped landing in someone elses lap, this time it was an attractive woman in her mid 30's,  
  
"Oh my are you alright dear? she asked calmly, Ranma noticed her good looks and blushed before speaking,  
  
"Ah, um, g - gomen" she uttered, then stood and ran out of the cinema followed by the ravenous feline hellspawn,  
  
*Aiyah! Now Shampoo save Ranma from bad kitty!* Shampoo thought to herself happily,  
  
*Meeeeeoooow* the cat growled hungrily as it approached the redhead, and just before it pounced a large mace like weapon impacted the poor ravenous hellspawn, leaving it twitching on the floor.  
  
"Aiyah! Shampoo save airen from bad kitty!" Shampoo gleefully exclaimed jumping into the shorter girls arms and glomping onto her with all her strength, Shampoo then started to rub herself up and down against Ranma's body trying to incite a response, "Airen give Shampoo reward for saving from bad kitty yes?"  
  
"Ah, Sh-Shampoo I'm sorta with someone y'know I *MMPH*" Ranma is cut off mid-sentence by Shampoo's sudden (french) kiss  
"*Mmm*Ah! *gasp*(catches breath) Shampoo why'd you do that!?"  
  
"RANMA! What're you doing with Shampoo!?"  
  
*Oh shit she saw!*  
"Akane it ain't what it looks like really!" Ranma says while making 'don't hit me' gestures with her hands  
  
"Oh Ranma you is too aggressive, Shampoo no expect sudden kiss from airen" says Shampoo still clinging to the shorter girl  
  
Akane starts walking towards them and then 'materializes' a huge mallet from nothing.  
  
*Oh man, I guess going a whole day without Akane hitting me was asking too much, oh well, I shall resign to my fate, the pain with fade soon enough* Ranma thinks as she closes her eyes readying herself for the pain that will surely come.  
  
*WHAM*  
  
Ranma opens her eyes to see an irate Akane standing over Shampoo's limp form on the ground.  
  
"Stupid Chinese slut! Hands off my man! um, woman, whatever!" Akane yells, though Shampoo isn't likely to hear it, Akane then grabs Ranma by the arm and drags her out of the lobby and back into the movie theatre.  
  
"Hey Akane, sure we should just leave her there?"  
  
"Someone will come take care of her Ranma, c'mon we have a movie to watch!" Akane is visibly upset,  
*Can't even have a normal date with my fiance without someone showing up to ruin it! and she had the nerve to kiss him, and right in front of me no less!*  
  
"Um, Akane" Ranma says as they're heading towards the cinema,  
  
"What!?"  
  
"Ah, Aren't you guna hit me, I mean, coz of what just happened with me and Shampoo?"  
  
Akane's temper gets the better of her and she turns around and punches Ranma in the face, Ranma's head moves to the side a bit but she doesn't show any sign of pain, just a hurt look in her eyes. Akane looks at her fist against Ranma's face and pulls it away as she begins to cry.  
  
"Akane? What's wrong?" Ranma asks  
  
"I'm sorry I hit you Ranma, I just can't control myself sometimes" she says sadly,  
  
"Hey, you did a better job of controlling yourself than usual, compared to the beatings I usually get that was just a little slap, c'mon, it's okay Akane, don't cry" Ranma says as she comforts the raven haired girl  
"C'mon Akane, I actually kinda deserved it, I didn't try to avoid it enough"  
*Like the time that asshole Mikado kissed me, yeauch!*  
  
Akane giggles as she wipes away her tears.  
  
"Hey what's so funny Akane?"  
  
"Nothing Ranma, lets just go watch the movie okay"  
  
"Okay"   
  
They walk back to their seats and Ranma puts her arm back around Akane's shoulder, and Akane once again snuggles up against Ranma as they watch Jet Lee pummel the crap out of himself.  
  
*Hmm, that kiss Shampoo gave me, I'm ashamed to admit, felt really good, especially the way her tongue moved in my mouth, if Akane knew that I sortof kissed back, she'd be furious, but I couldn't help it, Shampoo is no doubt sexy, she's well endowed and voluptuous to say the least, oh man, I shouldn't think about this stuff, not while I'm with Akane*  
  
Though Ranma can't see the expression on Akane's face from where she rests against her, she radiates barely contained fury.  
  
*That, that, JERK! how dare she think of any other girl but me!*  
  
"Ranma" Akane says looking slightly upwards at the other girl,  
  
"Um, yeah?" Ranma says nervously, seeing Akane's mad yet mischievous expression,  
  
"Did you enjoy that kiss Shampoo gave you?" she asks sternly,  
  
"Hmm, what? N-no of course not"   
  
"Don't lie to me Ranma I can tell when you're lying"  
  
"Ah, um, well, you see..."  
  
"Ranma, for kissing another girl and lying to me, you have to be punished" she said in a stern yet provocative manner while shaking her finger,  
*and also for thinking perverted thoughts about another girl*  
  
Akane then slips her hand between Ranma's legs and begins to caress the sensitive area, she then champs onto Ranma's right nipple and squeezes gently.  
  
"Ah, Mmmm, Akane, what're you doing?" Ranma asks between noises,  
  
"I'm making you suffer you pervert"  
  
"Mmm, please, stop it Akane, we're out in public y'know"  
*What's gotten into her?*  
  
*What has gotten into me?* She hastily shakes the thought aside and returns to 'punishing' Ranma,  
"What's the matter Ranma? Afraid?" She asks as she pauses briefly in her ministrations,  
  
"What, I ain't afraid of nuthin, other than cats of course" Ranma says almost confidently,  
  
"Oh yeah, well I bet you're too scared to fool around with me in public" Akane says, an obvious ploy,  
  
"Oh yeah, keep talkin like that and I just might"  
  
"I dare you"  
  
"Okay, you asked for it"  
  
Ranma pulls Akane into an embrace and kisses her passionately, and with one hand fondles her right breast, while Akane returns her hand to Ranma's crotch, they both move and grind against eachother while moaning barely loud enough for it to be audible over the sound effects of the movie, several male eye's have caught the display.  
  
"Hey dude would you check out those two chicks making out over there"   
  
"what, chicks makin out, where? Oh man they're both sexy as hell, what I wouldn't give to get a piece of that action"  
  
"Yeah right man, they're both dykes, like they'd ever go for an ugly ass mofo like you"  
  
"Hey a guy can dream right"  
  
Though Ranma's mind is barely able to function whilst being intoxicated by pleasure, a single thought manages to permeate through her head,  
*we're both girls, this is perverted!*  
  
Akane pulls away from Ranma and stares the shorter redhead in the eyes, they're are both beet red and flustered after making out so brazenly in public.  
  
"Um, Ranma, I don't know what's come over me recently, I've been acting so, perverted"  
  
"It's okay Akane, I like you better this way, now we're both perverts, and ummm, I really enjoyed what we we're, umm, doing just now" Ranma says as she fidgets and presses her index fingers together,  
"It felt really good"  
*Oh man I am so embarrassed what's Akane guna think, ARGE, I'm a sex fiend!*  
  
"Umm, Ranma, ah, if you like we can kiss some more"  
  
"oh, okay"  
  
They continue kissing and fondling each other till the movie has finished, a large portion of the male movie goers now realized that they wore pants which were far too tight, and are a little annoyed at missing nearly the entire movie.  
  
----------------  
  
Ranma and Akane have returned home and Akane is sitting in her room pondering her odd behaviour.  
  
*Why have I been acting so perverted lately, can it all be because of the wish I made*   
  
Akane thinks back over the events of last night, and the wish she had made.  
  
'I just wish I knew how he truly feels'  
*That's what I said when I saw that shooting star, and now I can't seem to stop myself from touching Ranma's body, hmm, 'how he truly feels' OH MY GOD, what if, what if what ever being granted my wish didn't know whether I meant 'how he feels' emotionally or 'how he feels' physically..*  
  
She pounds her fist into her hand.  
  
*That's it! all my sexual inhibitions have been removed, I used to be so shy about expressing my feelings towards Ranma, and now I'm all over him, even when he's been a girl, oh I'm such a temptress* she smiles at the thought of tempting Ranma with her feminine wiles, and then prepares to go to sleep, all the while hearing Ranma's lustful thoughts about her, she turns off the light and slips into bed.  
  
A perverted old malevolent being watches things from a tiny peep hole in the fabric of reality.  
"Heh heh, you got yer wish girly, and then some, HEH HEH HEH HErk* *Cough*Ack* goes into a coughing fit,  
"Hmm, I wonder how long till they do it, heh heh"  
  
---------------  
  
Ranma has slipped into the furo for a quick soak and is thinking over the days events.  
*Oh man, tonight was..weird, Akane is like a totally different person, since yesterday she's changed into a horny sex kitten, and the way she felt me up, even with me as a girl! I want her to touch me like that more often, I want to feel her naked sweaty body against mine, I want to feel her body tremble as I bring us both toward ecstasy, with the way she is now, that's a definite possibility* He thought with a grin,   
*I'm just so studly how can any girl resist me, heh heh, and even as a girl they still want me* Yes, Ranma has a big ego.  
  
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**Hey heyyy, I just gave Akane a reason to be a whole lot sleazier, oh I'm guna have fun with this, though it may have to convert to an 'R' rating, feh, whatever, hope j00 orl lieked this chapter anyway.** 


	3. RMOB chapter 3

I don't own dis', Rumiko Takahashi own dis'  
  
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Chapter 3 - it's getting even more lemon, you've been warned.  
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Onna-Ranma is tied naked to a bed as Akane wearing leather boots and gloves and a studded collar approaches seductively holding a whip and wearing an enormous phallic object strapped to her pelvis, Ranma is terrified at the sight of the huge object, easily a foot in length and 3 inches wide.  
  
"a-Akane, no, stay away from me, please, no!"  
  
"Ranma, what's wrong, don't you love me?"  
  
"It's not that I just.."  
  
"Then you won't mind if I enjoy your body, will you?" she asks as she slides across the naked girl's body, she pauses to lick Ranma's nipples, they stiffen in excitement,  
  
"Mmmm, ah, wait, please don't stick that thing in me, Mmmm" Ranma pleads  
  
"What's that, you want me to stick it in?"  
  
"No!" Ranma screams,  
  
Akane presses the end of the enormous phallic object against the moist lips of Ranma's pussy.  
  
"No Akane, don't!"  
  
Ignoring Ranma's protests, Akane gives a strong thrust and buries the entire length inside Ranma's depths.  
  
"AAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGE!!!!" Ranma yells as he awakens from the bizarre nightmare,  
  
The scream awakens Akane from her peaceful slumber, she sits up in bed and thinks about the pleasant dream she was having.  
*Damn, and I was having such a nice dream too, Ranma was tied to a bed naked and I was going to fuck her with an obscenely large strap-on dildo* then she realizes  
*Oh I'm such a sick pervert*  
  
She then begins to hear Ranma's thoughts again.  
  
"Aw man that was the weirdest dream I ever had, like Akane would ever try and stick something that huge up my, erm, thing, she knows I'm really a guy so she wouldn't ah, do that, to me, right?*  
  
It is then that Akane realizes they now share dreams aswell.   
  
*Another thing to have fun with* she thinks with a grin on her face.  
  
------------------  
  
The day begins with Ranma and Genma sparring outside as usual.  
  
"You're not focused boy!" Genma yells between blows,  
  
"shut up old man!"  
  
Ranma launches an aerial attack on his father raining down a hundred blows in a matter of seconds, Genma manages to block most of them but takes a hit in the solar plexus and gets badly winded, then Ranma leaps at his father with his foot outstretched for a fly kick, Genma mysteriously recovers and jumps in the air and in one motion blocks Ranma's kick and manages to plant a foot against his sons face, Ranma continues moving forward with momentum while spinning around and lands in the koi pond, Ranma then pulls herself out of the pond with an angry look on her face.  
  
"Hey you tricked me by pretending to be hurt"  
  
"Ranma when will you learn that deception is a key element of the anything goes style of martial arts"  
  
"That's it, anything goes school of martial arts secret technique, HAPPO 50 YEN SATSU!"  
  
"What! You never learned that technique!"  
  
As Ranma begins to draw a large circle with the 50 yen piece she seems to fumble with the coin.  
  
"Oh I seem to have dropped the 50 yen coin I was going to use"  
  
"It's mine!"  
  
As Genma dives for the fallen piece of silver his path is obstructed by a knee, which collides with his head and knocks him into the pond.  
  
"Geez pop, you're one to talk, gullible fool"  
  
"Growf" [That was a dirty trick]  
  
---------  
  
Ranma walks inside for breakfast and sits next to Akane, who scoots over to get a bit closer.  
  
"So Ranma, hows was the date late night?" asked Nabiki,  
  
"Huh, oh yeah it was, um, real good" she said blushing,  
*Akane and I were making out practically all the way through it*  
  
"Oh? and what was the movie like?"  
  
"Yeah, the movie was great, lots of fighting and stuff"  
*I have no idea*  
  
"well I'm glad you had such a good time" Nabiki says and then winks at the redhead  
  
Akane begins to feel Ranma's thigh with her hand under the table and Ranma starts to get nervous.  
  
*What's Akane doing? The whole family is watching*  
  
Ranma leans over and whispers in the other girls ear.  
  
"Hey, quit it would ya"  
  
Ranma grabs Akane's hand and places it in the other girls lap and begins eating, but Akane moves it back to where it was, and moves her hand to Ranma's inner thigh and is slowly creeping upwards...  
  
"k-Kasumi, ah, c-could you please get me some hot water" Ranma says nervously,  
  
"certainly Ranma-chan, I'll be right back" says Kasumi as she leaves the room to get some hot water.  
  
*Akane's getting all touchy feelly, especially when I'm a girl, it's making me nervous, I'd rather not be a girl around her if I can help it*  
  
Akane draws her hand away feeling a little hurt at Ranma's thought's.  
  
*He thinks I'm a pervert*  
  
Kasumi returns and pours hot water over Ranma.  
  
"Thanks Kasumi" says the now male Ranma,  
  
*Maybe it's just that weird dream that's making me nervous, I don't mind being a girl with Akane, but I'd rather she keep her hands off till we're, in private I guess, heh heh*  
  
Akane smiles and starts eating.  
  
----------------  
  
Akane enters the dojo and watches while Ranma goes through some Kata's, she can feel his movement, his concentration, and she decides to test something out.  
  
"Ranma, will you spar against me?"  
  
"You know I don't hit girls Akane"  
  
"You don't have to, you can just dodge like you always do, but don't blame me if you get hurt coz you won't fight back"  
*I can read all your moves Ranma, you don't stand a chance*  
  
"Alright Akane, come at me"  
*she seems awfully confident all of a sudden*  
  
Akane starts running towards where Ranma is standing and yells as she throws a fist, as usual Ranma dodges, but this time, Akane senses his intended path a split second before he moves and she strikes out where he will be before he gets there, he stops to see a fist coming at him, again he dodges, just barely by flipping over Akane, however, Akane does not sense him above her, rather she senses herself below him, as if from Ranma's perspective, Akane lashes out with spinning kick, as Ranma lands behind her, her foot connects with his right side, Ranma then staggers about and gets in a ready stance.  
  
"Akane, how'd you get so good all of a sudden?"  
*How the hell is she reading my moves so quick, she's never been this fast*  
  
"Wouldn't you like to know"  
  
"I just asked didn't I, c'mon, come at me again, this time I'm ready for ya"  
  
"Alright Ranma, here I come"   
  
Akane once again charges at Ranma wildly throwing fists, this time Ranma stands his ground blocking rather than dodging, not giving Akane a chance to catch him off guard, though she seems to be giving him a run for his money, Akane can no longer hears his thoughts though, however, she instinctively knows where to strike and counter his moves, (this is mind reading on a sub-conscious level folks), however, although she knows how to counter his moves, she is not physically capable of reacting fast enough, suddenly Ranma stops blocking and leans backwards to avoid Akane's fist, Akane goes slightly off balance and Ranma uses this to his advantage, he moves forward and in one motion catches her arm underneath his, and leans his body forward pulling Akane onto his back, he then leaps high in the air with Akane on his back and then contorts his body so that Akane lands on her back with him ontop, sortof like a Wrestling suplex, the entire weight of Ranma's body has smashed Akane into the ground, this all happens within mere seconds. Ranma pry's himself off the barely conscious Akane and helps her to her feet.  
  
"Hey Akane, sorry for being so rough, how'd you improve so fast anyways? I haven't seen you training that much"  
  
"Uh, Ouch, you're heavy Ranma, that really hurt, anyway, you took me more seriously this time, you actually put some damage on me" she says still in a daze,  
  
"Hey, I don't hit girls, I didn't say nuthin about body slammin em'"  
*oh man how stupid am I!? Body slam!? That must've sounded totally perverted*  
  
"Hey Ranma, you can body slam me any time, as long as you're gentle" she says stroking his face  
  
"Uh..." Ranma gets nervous and starts blushing when he hears her say this, then Akane draws her hand back and makes it into a fist and punches him square in the face, Ranma collapses on the ground gushing blood everywhere,  
  
"Geez Ranma, you're so stupid, I can't believe you fell for that" Akane says and starts giggling as she staggers out of the dojo, still sore from Ranma's suplex move.  
  
--------------  
  
It's about lunch time and Ranma and Akane are walking to Uchan's to get some Okonomiyaki, on the way they begin to hear a rumbling sound, somewhat like an earthquake, they turn around to see a large dust cloud, at the front of which, is Happosai.  
  
"What a haul, what a haul!" he yells with glee,  
  
"Gets back here you dirty old man!"  
"Give me back my underwear! That was my last pair!"  
"You'll pay for this you pervert!"  
  
"Awe man it's the freak pillaging panties again" Ranma grumbled,  
*For an old guy he sure does have a lot of stamina to out run all those angry women, I think the chase is part of the fun for him, well, too bad the chase is about to end*  
  
Ranma leaps out infront of the hoard and extends his leg out to intercept the diminutive old pervert, but Happosai grabs Ranma's foot and hauls himself onto of his leg and runs along it, and then drops some of his prized undergarments on Ranma's head before leaping away.  
  
"There you go Ranma, it's a parting gift for your assistance!" The old man yelled as he jumped towards more exposed underwear hanging outside balconies, of course, by assistance, he meant unwittingly diverting attention away from himself,  
  
"Hey, that guy has some of our underwear, he must be teaming up with the old man!"  
  
"No wait, it's not what you think! I have no interest in stealing womens underwear at all!"  
  
They completely ignore his pleads of innocence and commence pummeling the pigtailed boy. Afterwards Akane helps him to his feet and they continue walking.  
  
"Are you okay Ranma"  
  
"Sure, I've had worse beatings than that" he said dusting himself off,  
*That old goat, using me as a diversion, he's always using me for somethin, man, with a master like him I have no need for enemies. But then, without enemies like him, life wouldn't be a constant struggle, I'd have no reason to get stronger, like the Hiryu Shoten Ha, I would've never learnt that technique if Happosai hadn't hit that weakness point, and there are other adversaries, most of which are somehow connected to Jusenkyo, Tarou, Ryoga, Mouse, cologne, my curse and the circumstances that surround it have led me to these people, and I've had to become far stronger because of it, it really is ironic that to become strong, I first had to become weak, maybe it's that yin yang stuff.  
"Akane"  
  
"Yes Ranma?"  
  
"I got a hypothetical question for ya, suppose you could choose between me, and another Ranma from a parallel universe that was exactly like me in every possible way, except that this other Ranma was weaker than me, but didn't have a Jusenkyo curse, who would you pick?"  
  
"Well that's simple, I'd pick the one who was the most happy"  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"I'd pick the one who accept's himself, and loves himself for who he is, because Ranma, you can't expect anyone else to accept you and love you if you can't first accept and love yourself, and also, have you ever thought that if it wasn't for your curse, we might not even be engaged, remember when we first met?"  
  
"Yeah"  
*You wanted to be my friend and as soon as you found out I was a guy you pushed me away, and it hurt*  
  
"I'm...I'm sorry for how I first reacted to your curse, I...I was selfish back then, I didn't take your feelings into consideration, but if it wasn't for your curse, you might've ended up with either of my sisters, you remember how they pushed me into being your fiance, I don't think either of them wanted to marry a man who was a girl half the time, and back then I hated boys, so if you didn't have a curse, you'd most probably be engaged to Nabiki or maybe even Kasumi, did you ever think of that?"  
  
"Hey, I guess you're right, I owe a lot to my curse, and not just my strength"  
*I'd take you over a cure anyday, hmm, how'd Akane get so smart about relationships anyway, I never new she understood me so well*  
  
*Ooooh, I'm so glad I bought that 'how to improve your relationship' guide from the bookstore after school yesterday, now to see if I can remember all the main points, 1. trust 2. communication 3. understanding 4. don't hide feelings and 5. learn to cook! I made up the last one but it really is necessary*  
  
*Akane has changed so much in the last couple of days, she's still as fiery as ever, but now she's blossoming into a woman, I love her even more than before, if only I could tell her, I will soon, but I'll wait till the right moment*  
  
Akane starts to blush furiously.  
  
*He loves me!*  
  
They near Uchan's and walk inside, Ranma enters first followed by Akane.  
  
"Oh hello Ranchan! Hi Akane" she greets Akane a little less cheerfully when she enters,  
  
"Hello Ukyo" Akane says as she sits down  
  
"Hey Uchan, so hows things?" Ranma asks in a friendly manner,  
  
"Oh just fine Ranchan, business is good, even without my number 1 waitress"  
  
"Heh, y'know me, yo Akane what sortof Okonomiyaki you want?"  
  
"Um, pork please"  
*Hmm, lets see how Ukyo reacts if I move a little closer to 'Ranchan'*  
  
Akane shifts her seat over to be closer to Ranma, Ukyo is visibly upset at the display of affection though Ranma doesn't notice.  
  
"Umm, Ukyo, I'll pay for Akane's okay" Ranma says  
  
"Oh no that's fine Ranchan, you don't have to pay for what Akane eats, it's on the house sugar"  
  
"Thanks Uchan, you're a real pal y'know that" Ranma says as a plate of Okonomiaki is placed infront of him and he starts eating,  
  
*Hmm, Ranma really does see Ukyo as just a friend, I feel kinda sorry for her, I shouldn't tease her by being so affectionate to Ranma in front of her* Akane thinks as she shifts her seat away from Ranma slightly.  
  
Ukyo puts a plate of Okonomiaki infront of Akane and looks her in the eyes with that 'hands off my Ranchan' glare, Akane simply looks back at her Okonomiaki, on it reads 'hands off my Ranchan' Akane seems not to notice and starts eating it.  
  
-------------------------  
  
After lunch Ranma and Akane head in separate directions, Akane goes by train to the inner city to go shopping while Ranma goes home to 'study'. Akane is walking past a row of shops when she notices one which catches her interest, the sign above the store says 'sex toys 'R' us' Akane hesitates to enter, first glancing around to make sure no one is watching, then she quickly slips into the store.  
  
------------------------  
  
Meanwhile, Ranma has gone to the Nekohanten to talk to Cologne, however he gets stopped by Mousse on the way there.  
  
"Ranma Saotome!"  
  
"Hey Mousse hows it hangin man, lemme guess you wanna fight me over Shampoo right?"  
  
"Ranma, I heard about what you and Akane did you Shampoo at the movie theatre last night, how dare you lay a finger on my precious Shampoo, you vile enemy of women!"  
  
"Hey Mousse, if anyone should be sympathetic to the fairer sex it'd be me, how could I be an enemy to women if I _was_ a woman nearly the whole night?"  
  
"Enough with your excuses and fight me!" Mousse yelled as he launched himself in the air raining down chained weapons at Ranma.  
Ranma simply side stepped to dodge the barrage of chains and casually grabbed one that was still protruding from Mousses bottomless sleeve and yanked on it swiftly bringing the blind Amazon flying toward the ground.  
  
"I won't go down that easy!" Mousse yelled just as he descended on Ranma who brought a roaring uppercut toward the other body, which he deflected with a... duck shaped training potty.  
  
"Awe man not this lame shit again" Ranma complained,  
  
"Don't take me lightly Ranma!" Mousse yelled as again he threw numerous objects on chains flying out of his sleeves, as he did so Ranma circled around him getting closer while ducking and weaving through the chained projectiles, somehow in Mousse's vain attempts at scoring a blow against Ranma he managed to get his chains somewhat tangled, Ranma used this moment to rush in and beat Mousse senseless, Ranma stood next to the fallen Amazon and offered his hand to help the other boy to his feet, Mousse smacked it aside and painfully stood up by himself.  
  
"Look Mousse, there aint no point in tryin to beat me, y'ain't never guna win, and anyway, I'm sorry about Shampoo, but that was Akane who knocked her out, you know how that voilent tomboy gets"  
  
"Shut up Ranma, I suppose next you'll be saying you have no interest in Shampoo right?"  
  
"Well, now that you mention it she is kinda cute, maybe I'll add her to my list of conquests hmm" Mousse is visibly fuming after this comment, " Hey I was just kidding man relax, no I don't got no interest in Shampoo alright"  
  
"Then why do you keep her from me Saotome, do you just get some sadistic pleasure from crushing my chances with Shampoo?"  
  
"It's not me who's keepin ya apart, it's that stupid Amazon law thingy, hmph, look I could talk all day but the fact is I have some important business to attend to with the old crone alright" Ranma say as he leaps in the dirrection of the Nekohanten. Mousse regains his composure and retreives the Ramen from where he left it and continued on his delivery.  
  
"Ranma, I swear that one day I will defeat you and take Shampoo as my rightful bride"  
  
------------------  
  
Ranma enters the Nekohanten and walks over to where Cologne is behind the counter.  
  
"Why hello future son in law, I'm afraid you can't see Shampoo right now, she has a migraine you see"  
  
"Ah, heh heh, that would be Akane's doing, ah, sorry but I didn't come to see Shampoo, I came to see you actually"  
  
"Oh, and why would that be future son in law?"  
  
"Well, I was wondering if you might share something with me?"  
  
"And what would that be?"  
  
"Well, future mother in law *cringe* I'm not very experienced with women you see, and I was wondering if there were any secret erm, 'pressure points' which could be used to give, erm, pleasure, umm, I mean when Shampoo and I y'know, do it, I just wanna be good at it y'know"  
*Ah man, she doesn't believe of word of this crap, I was really laying it on thick with that mother in law stuff, I'm so transparent*  
  
"Well son in law, I never expected you ask something like that, there are many pressure points on the human body which can make a person, how should I put this, more responsive, so you want to be able to please Shampoo, very well then, I will lend you the scrolls with the techniques you request"  
  
"Thank you very much future mother in law" Ranma said politely as he bowed to the diminutive Matriarch,  
  
"Don't mention it future son in law, you'll make Shampoo very happy" she said as she winked at him  
  
Ranma then hastily left the Nekohanten with the scrolls he needed and went back to the Tendo residence.  
  
--------------------------  
  
Akane exits the sex shop with her face beet red.  
  
*So that's what they meant by 'toys' how did that clerk manage to sell me all this stuff, as soon as I get home I have to find a place to hide all of this*  
  
Akane notices that she hasn't been able to hear Ranma's thoughts for quite some time.  
  
*Hmm, must be out of range* She thinks as she makes her way back to the train station.  
  
-------------------------  
  
Ranma is sitting in her room naked with scrolls sprawled over the floor one of which is open to a diagram depicting various pressure points.  
  
*Akane's in town, Kasumi is out buying groceries, Nabiki's gone debt collecting, and Tendo and pop are out somewhere, that leaves me all alone to figure out these pressure points, I've already figured out all the 'erogenous' zones on a womans body, and have them well documented* she thinks as she flips through a notebook which is half full with detailed techniques for pleasuring a womans body.  
  
"Man, this looks difficult, I gotta hit 3 places at once, I guess I can use these acupuncture needles, ok I put one here, and one here" Ranma is talking to herself as she places acupuncture needles in various places.  
"and then I hit this spot above my pelvis with my finger and.." as Ranma hits that magical point her body starts to become incredibly aroused, and Ranma almost compulsively starts fondling herself.  
"Mmmm, ah, wait, gotta read on..must..find..Mmmmmm..counter point" as Ranma says this to herself she reaches her hand out to find the passage on the scroll which tells how to counter the arousal point, however before she reaches it she feels the compulsion to alleviate the itching urge between her legs.  
  
----------------------  
  
Meanwhile a certain perverted old being watches the events unfold on his television.  
  
"Ah now this shows finally starting to get good, lets see how the other one is going" he says as he picks up the remote to change channels to see a certain someone riding the train home.  
"Awe this show aint no good, perhaps if I push this button" he pushes another button on the remote and waits to see the result.  
  
----------------------  
  
Akane is still riding the train when suddenly she comes within range of Ranma's thoughts again, and the sensation hits her like a bus.  
  
*Ah! Mmmm, I think I'm having some sortof sensory overload! WHERE'S THAT GODDAMN COUNTER POINT! Ah screw it, I'll get myself off first so I can think straight*  
  
Akane starts to squirm in her seat when she suddenly becomes aroused and begins to feel the sensations that Ranma is giving her own body. She holds on to the seat to try and control herself and fight the urge to gratify herself, a short moan escapes her lips gaining the attention of all the male passengers, who watch as she shakes uncontrolably while rubbing her thighs together.  
  
*Ah! Ranma you BAKA! Mmmm, not now! Please stop*  
  
The train comes to a stop and she rushes out to find the nearest public toilet, the seat she was using is left a bit damp.  
  
--------------------  
  
"AH! AH! Mmmmmm!" Ranma moans as she carresses her pussy, while her other hand fondles her left breast, she feels the pressure building in her loins and then suddenly her body starts convulsing as she orgasms, leaving a small pool of juices just underneath her, she lifts her fingers in front of her face and inspects them.  
  
*Eww, smells funny, I should see what it tastes like, for when I erm, do it with Akane*   
  
Ranma inserts her sticky didgets in her mouth and coils her tounge around them licking of all of the sticky substance.  
  
*hmm, it's not so bad, oh no, it's starting again* she thinks as her body starts to become arroused again.  
  
"Oh no, not this time" She says as she picks up the accupuncture needles, she quicky reads the scroll and tends to the various pressure points.  
  
"whew, I'd better clean this up and take a bath"  
  
--------------------  
Whew, I can't be bothered writing anymore, unless everyone who reviews it says they really really really like it.  
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